Cool Hearse Feature You Never Knew About

"Dusty Ventures" (dustyventures)
03/13/2014 at 11:59 • Filed to: None

Virtually all hearses built in the past 20 or so years have air suspensions, because dat ride, yo. As an added feature of the suspension most have a button or switch in the back that allows you to lower the back of the hearse for easier loading. To lower the rear on ours you have to turn off the engine and hold a button inside the rear door on the right side. Dropping it the amount shown takes about 20 seconds. To raise it back up you start the car and let it do it's thing. Up, of course, is slower and takes about 45 seconds. It's a fantastic feature and makes it possible for a single person (usually me) to load a 350+ pound casket solo.

DISCUSSION (26)

505Turbeaux > Dusty Ventures
03/13/2014 at 12:02

I didnt know you were rolling with the deceased Dusty. Are you a professional or are you just driving that whip around?

Hooker > Dusty Ventures
03/13/2014 at 12:03

Kinja'd!!!

My dad had a 1992 International ambulance as a mobile garage/DD and it had a similar setup. It would lower anytime the rear doors were opened.

Frank Grimes > Dusty Ventures
03/13/2014 at 12:03

because obesity? I Desperately want to hire a herse company to make me a lincoln town car shooting brake.

Nibby > Dusty Ventures
03/13/2014 at 12:05

Is there enough space back there for 2 people?

You know...

duurtlang > Dusty Ventures
03/13/2014 at 12:05

Those are quite long waits. Especially since Citroën has been mass producing millions of cars with a much faster system. Since the mid 1950s. The pictured car is completely stock and was introduced in 1982. It could be bought for the same price as a base VW Golf.

Dusty Ventures > Frank Grimes
03/13/2014 at 12:07

Actually because even when empty caskets are heavy. Especially the fancy hardwood ones. A hardwood can weigh as much as 300 pounds empty. Even the lightest caskets are about 100 pounds.

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > Dusty Ventures
03/13/2014 at 12:07

Air Ride was OE equipment on most Town Cars because Lincoln wanted its buyers to get used to it.

Dusty Ventures > Nibby
03/13/2014 at 12:09

If you mean what I think you mean, then yes

offroadkarter > Dusty Ventures
03/13/2014 at 12:09

Uh, that might depend on who did the conversion. Unless I missed something in the 3 years I worked the family funeral home, I never once saw such a switch on our 99 deville superior hearse. It does have air ride though.

Blondude > Nibby
03/13/2014 at 12:10

Nibby, how many times do I have to tell you? Necrophillia is illegal!

Coty > Dusty Ventures
03/13/2014 at 12:10

WEIRD HEARSE DRIVING STORIES. GO!

Nibby > Dusty Ventures
03/13/2014 at 12:10

Good. Beetlejuice will be on his way shortly

Nibby > Blondude
03/13/2014 at 12:11

Dead girls can't say no. /trolololo

Dusty Ventures > duurtlang
03/13/2014 at 12:11

I could be exaggerating and it just feels like it takes that long. I haven't put it up against a stopwatch. That said the lengthier duration (at least on the reinflation) may have something to do with the weight. The typical hearse weighs over three tons.

Dusty Ventures > 505Turbeaux
03/13/2014 at 12:12

Born into the business

505Turbeaux > Dusty Ventures
03/13/2014 at 12:12

gotcha. Very cool

Dusty Ventures > offroadkarter
03/13/2014 at 12:14

A surprising number of people don't know it's there, even those in the biz. On ours it's literally a button the size of a dime recessed into the fabric about eight inches in from the door and 1.5 inches up from the deck. Unless you look there specifically you're not going to see it.

Frosted > Dusty Ventures
03/13/2014 at 12:19

I want to daily drive a hearse. Is that morbid and wrong?

McMike > Dusty Ventures
03/13/2014 at 12:19

"Lower it" now has new meaning.

Kinja'd!!!

Dusty Ventures > Coty
03/13/2014 at 12:20

Not sure I have many, really. I can tell you it's a great winter drifter, but aside from that it's just like driving a regular car (that's 21 feet long and has the rear visibility of a creeper van)

Dusty Ventures > Frosted
03/13/2014 at 12:21

Nope. Your wallet will probably hate it though. We average under 15 mpg

Frosted > Dusty Ventures
03/13/2014 at 12:24

Maybe I can turn one into a drift missile then. Hmmmmm...

Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection > Dusty Ventures
03/13/2014 at 12:35

You're in the funeral business? I have some questions for you because my wife is currently in school for her AAS in Mortuary Science to get her Funeral Director's license. She's committed enough to be willing to drive two hours each way to her embalming lab twice a week — although she'd prefer not to do that and go the apprenticeship route.

We actually don't know many people in the business, though. My soon-to-be-stepdad's father is a frequent volunteer for a local family-owned funeral home, but we don't see him often and she hasn't had the opportunity to go with him for his volunteer work.

Around here the funeral homes seem to all be either close-knit family businesses or SCI facilities. Without an, "In," or someone willing to introduce her to the right people, what can we do to make sure that we're networking properly? After the fall semester, she'll be ready to start the apprenticeship and go forward.

She's got an incredible sense of empathy and can maintain a cool head while everyone around her is deeply emotional. She's also the go-to person in her family during a health crisis because she thinks clearly. She enjoys being around the elderly and wants to be able to provide them a service that can give them comfort and solace in a time of loss. She is also comfortable with people's bodies. From what we've heard, those skills are necessary for the business.

So, thank you for reading. Any input you may have would be greatly appreciated.

You can tell a Finn but you can't tell him much > McMike
03/13/2014 at 13:22

Now I don't feel so bad about the joke I'm going to reply to Dusty with. Good to know I'm not the only one with a morbid sense of humor.

You can tell a Finn but you can't tell him much > Dusty Ventures
03/13/2014 at 13:23

They should put that on trucks too. It would make it easier for loading dead weight.

/Sorry, bad joke.

Dusty Ventures > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection
03/13/2014 at 15:38

Unfortunately I'm not sure I can be much help. I was born into a multi-generational funeral business, so finding an "in" was never a concern really (honestly, I'm more interested in an out. Massachusetts laws suck and I can't see myself doing this another 30+ years).